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^ is an allegorical agitator.
^ He formerly faulted a few favorite friends for flatus from free fried flautas.
^ eating falafel gives him fiery flatulence.
^ ate homemade waffle giving him rapid flatulence.
^ tried swimming the rapids in full armour. @the ghost of le_chevalier
^ tried to bathe in a freezer. Ended up sleeping inside an ice cube.
^ He once failed to free a feral feline from far up in a fir.
^ tries to convince people that fir needles are an essential part of a salad.
^Thinks pine nuts are quite lewd
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teceem: ^ tries to convince people that fir needles are an essential part of a salad.
Are you telling me they aren't?!? *spits out needles and a bit of blood/teeth*

Has my whole life been a lie?!?
^ finally understands why people think he's a meth addict when he gives them a smile.
^ Had a heart atack-ack-ack-ack!
Post edited 3 days ago by HeresMyAccount
^ He was the stunt double for Chuck Norris in most of his action films.
^ He was a stunt double for a trashcan in a barbershop in most of his action films.
^ was caught using forward-looking infrared transceiver (FLIRT) to herd animals, to trigger mating season.