Granted, every site begins selling the same games that GOG. It seems like a franchise, soon they swith the business for a better profitable franchise and now are the biggest and baddest Starbucks online stores. No games for you!

I wish for the most excelent adventure ever.

Granted, but you need windows 3.1 to play it.

I wish I could live in some kind of Die Another Day type palace made entirely from ice, in a climate where it wouldn't melt.

Enjoy your new castle... INNNNN SPAAAAAAACE!!!

I wish someone would come out with a Civ-style 4X game featuring the terraforming and colonizing of Mars.

Granted. But it requires an always-online DRM connection to a server that never really works. So no one will ever be able to play the game for more than 5 minutes (if at all) and saving the game is also not possible.


I wish to be able to teleport precisely and without accidents to wherever I want to, whenever I want to (and only when I want to).

Granted, but you will always arrive at your destination naked.

I wish that more and better executed PC ports are made during the next-gen console cycle.

Granted, but you have to deal with the always on DRM.

I wish to live forever.

Alright. You live for ever. Starting at the big bang. Have fun the next few billion years where you are all alone in the entire universe.


I wish that no one takes offence at my nudity.

Granted. Instead of taking offence, now everyone has pity on you. Just look down yourself, if you wonder why.
(OK, I guess, this corruption was predictable ;-))

I wish all mosquitoes to be wiped out of existence. Everywhere, always, in every dimension!

Granted, but without mosquitoes, bug spray companies go out of business, throwing the world economy into collapse and reducing the world to a collection of wastelands wherein there is survival only for those willing to kill.

I wish we would finally get that Beyond Good & Evil sequel, ten years later.

Granted Beyond good and evil 2 is going to be released the same day the new consoles, too bad that you won't live long enough to play it.

I wish for free beer and chicken wings for everyone, fat chicks abstain.

Granted, but all the wings give everyone heart attacks, leaving the world to the fat chicks.

I wish that I didn't need to sleep

Granted, but you have so much spare time and nothing to do with it that your right hand swells up to the size of a watermelon (I think you know why)!

I wish I had hands instead of flippers :(

Granted, but your flipper-configured computer assures that you can't use it with hands.

I wish that I had a lifetime supply of twizlers.

Granted but they're poopoo flavored and dry up after awhile.

I wish moving didn't suck so bad.

Granted! You are paralyzed from top to bottom and cannot breath let alone shit on your own without the help of medical equipment. Enjoy your STAY! ;-p

I wish for a time machine in the form of a Delorian that can go forward as well as backwards in time at ANY point in time and has infinite fuel and flux and never breaks down and always has a clean pair of underwear just my size in the trunk.