^ was a guide for the Romans crossing Teutoburg Forest. He was responsible for using faulty GPS and causing them to get lost.

Confused GPS with UPS and got sent to the wrong address.

^ has large sum of shell money deposited in a bank at the bottom of the sea.

^ He keeps getting grifted by the dude with the shell game down on W. 34nd St.

^ thinks GOG should introduce DRM into their games to ‘save the platform’

^ Brah is totally harsh.

^ not a while ago visited his girlfriend in Mexico. He still have visible sunburn from that moment while visiting the beach, not because of solar flare radiation from a distant star named Chan.

^ He's a hypocrite who accuses other people of having a sunburn even though he's standing on the surface of the sun.

^ has a girlfriend who lives on another planet.

^ He had a star named after his girlfriend by the International Star Registry.

^ in recent visit to Corona, California he caught something and gave it to his neighbors back home as gift.

^ He squeezed some grapes and they let out a little whine.

^ He once went on a fishing trip and caught a mermaid. He let her go because she smelt funny...

^ He's actually a mermaid in drag, but you can't see his bottom half in the image.

^ He has no friends IRL.