I take an elevator to the top of the tallest building in town and pour into the sky all my monopoly money, which includes cannibalized bills from 2 other boards.

On the way up, I also cast the Want It/Need it spell from the Lesson Zero episode of My Little Pony on all the bills so that everybody who looks at them will be willing to kill each other for them.

Somehow, all of the monopoly money falls into my hands. I determine what spell was cast on them, and burn up the bills, so I am the only one who ever sees it. Hence, nobody else is affected by the spell, and hence there's nobody I want to kill for them.

Looking at my spellbook, I notice a spell called Sabbath Curse in it, and I cast that spell on the next user, without trying to figure out what the spell does first.

I innately understand that if I defy the strictest Sabbath rules ever decreed, I'll experience the Ten Plagues of Egypt centered around me and confined entirely in whatever room or acre I am in. So once again, I grab some snacks and my laptop and wait it out in the bathroom until it's over.

Having taken a closer look at a spell I previously botched, I cast Elderwood Embrace correctly this time on the next user's lawn.

Unfortunately, the Sabbath rules consider using your laptop to be work, and therefore you end up experiencing the Ten Plagues of Egypt despite your best efforts to avoid them.

Granted: There's now an old tree, or at least there's one until the authorities notice the tree that towers over everything else in the area and order it cut down.

I cast Greater Arcane Healing on the next user.

My recovery from the plagues is swift, but now my home is flooded with dead flies/frogs and the pipes are stained red. I cast Mickey Mouse's Animate Brooms to remove all animal remains from the premises.

Well, the brooms come, remove the animated brooms, but it seems that you left the contrabassoon you used to cast the spell over at my place, and it's now mine.

Using the contrabassoon, I create some minor vibrations by playing a really low note on it. (Specifically, I play the lowest note, a low b-flat; for those familiar with the piano, it's the second lowest note on that instrument.) The next user can feel this note, and might even be able to hear it.

(By the way, while I obviously don't own a contrabassoon IRL (they're too expensive), I have been able to try one a few times, and I can get that low b-flat out.)

With my own contrabassoon, I contravene by playing a contrapuntal e-flat. If the sound is not unpleasant, then the notes are not out of tune; which is, of course, the contrapositive.

I then cast Contradict on the next to appear; let's see how they controvert it.

Well, it seems that you made a mistake with your fingering, failed to press the pancake key (or whatever the contrabassoon equivalent is; it's been a while since I got to try one), resulting in you playing an E, which leads to a tritone, which is a dissonance (I believe called something like the "Devil's Interval" or something; back in the day, composers weren't supposed to use that interval).

Being tired of these low notes, I take a piccolo and play a piercingly high B-natural (in the third octave, so I believe this may be the second highest note on the piano).