Ladies and gentlemen. If you ever wanted to find the perfect example of a story so good it topples the most awful gameplay, this is it. I will start with the most awful, the gameplay. The programming was made by two people, literally. This resulted in a gameplay that feels like trying to sway a train with a car's wheel while listening to Abba. There is no volume control, there is no map, there is not even a simple attempt at a journal, nothing. The attack follows the mouse pointer, which would be ok if this was a diablo game. It isn't. It's an action 'rpg' the same way pringles is technically 'potato chips'. There are four slots for potions, but only three kinds of potions. You can't arrange inventory because every time you click something you immediately equip it. Yes, it's THAT bad. But the story is really good. It's not deep, but picks basically every single (and yes, EVERY SINGLE) rpg most used tropes and subverts it. There isn't a single style of overused humor that will grind your patience after fifteen minutes (I'm looking at you, Borderlands), it keeps switching humor styles and throwing curveballs at you. And it doesn't limit itself to humor, no. The main character isn't a complete jerk, none of the side characters is completely shallow in their characterization and development, every single one of them (except the racist zealot elf because racist zealot elf). The story asks good questions about the nature of war, about countries pushed too far to the point of utter and complete desperation and how it changes people, of science being used to deal with the problems of mankind right NOW instead of pushing it to the future in an irresponsible manner, but also going through boundaries considered sane in search of a victory whose cost may be too much. And when you think it's too serious, it tosses a joke to lighten the mood. It never gets too cliched, and if it threatens to do so, it's in order to poke fun at the clichés. Definitely deserves a Remake.
Basically, and keeping it succinct, this is one of the very few games astonishingly only delivered part of the visual aspect. It's like asking for a Pizza and receiving a half-baked taco. We've all been there. The premise is basically that a super-smart robot invaded your apartment one night and is asking for your help, fine, fun, interesting premise, like going to the amusement park, you know most of the fun rides but there is always something new. Gameplay-wise, it behaves akin to a visual novel more than a point and click adventure, simple as that. Rarely you'll need to get back and forth, rarely you'll need to solve a puzzle, if none at all. It could be forgiven if the story was interesting... Which is not. Basically, this game is plagued by one of the worst set of characters I've ever seen. The robot tells you that it will be your friend, but every single scene it admonishes you for something you did, or speak in a condescending tone. Others are downright hostile, weirdly dumping their life stories to someone whom they barely met and openly insulted. The only character to be truly friendly with you is the cop gal. That's it. Yet the game tells me that I should care for those people, that I should compliment the robot every second on the way and seek the creator of an annoying machine that will literally try to sway nearly any conversation to talk about itself. So it's more or less like one of those Carnivals that were already into town, with a bad paint job, broken attractions and you're pretty sure someone is going to stab you if you go to that hotdog stand. And they try to sell themselves as new.
And I've played Temple of elemental Doom. Keeping things short and succinct, nearly every aspect of this game is irrevocably broken, and whoever designed these quests either never played as the game master in a pen and paper rpg. Mechanically-Wise, the game was supposed to be a turn-based combat, 'upgraded' to real tactics, which is a serious problem when your foes can move out of order, your characters need to make the animation AFTER their turn started (wasting even more time), the rules aren't clear on what was changed from the pen-and-paper version (there is no disarm for example) and god help your soul if you aren't familiar with Pathfinder. This is even made worse and more jarring when the enemies are insanely over-leveled (even on normal) with wild rules spawning random encounters ten levels above your party. If you and your party aren't min-maxed optimized, game over man, game over. And to make things even more interesting, the recruitable npcs have some of the worst point distribution I've ever seen. Which is made worse by how this game was made, story-wise. As an example, the first quest out of the tutorial is to find some berries. Your party will at most be at level 2. You are expected to kill giant spiders and spider-mobs, who are immune to anything except splash damage. Originally there was literally no indication on how to kill those mobs or any help to do it, it had to be patched after complaints. Said mobs have a touch AC of 17. AC 17 against a level 2 group. Let it sink. And now extend this thought through the entire game. I couldn't resolve a tribal conflict peacefully without bloodshed because my character WASN'T NEUTRAL. To call the companions one-dimensional is overdoing it, they are parodies of their classes, with the 'for the evilz' rogue, the barely-understandable rage barbarian, the young and pure and naive cleric, the asshole knight. There is no charm, there is no lure, there is no epic struggle or mystery.
Before starting, I'm a veteran of this kind of rpg, Baldur's Gate Saga, Icewind Dale, Planescape Torment (my favorite of all time), I've played it all, so you know I won't be some 'noob' who bumbles around with the controls and is incapable of handling a manual. Pillars of Eternity is an important game in this generation that was forcefed games made by publishers that had no contact with their public, it was successfully financed by the public, and from that standpoint Obsidian was more than successful. This game was made with love, and with lots of holes... Starting with the good aspects, every companion so far has interesting stories to tell and different personalities that can be deep. The way the characters are generated are meant to avoid Minmaxing, every single stat can help any kind of character in some way, enabling different builds for different classes. Speaking of which, equipment works differently. Every weapon has pros and cons, and any class can use anything. A wizard can use heavy plating, a warrior can use a long-range wand, heavy armor makes actions slower, and certain enemies are immune to certain kinds of damage, so you can't rely on a single sword all the time. The music made by Justin Bell is... practically a carbon copy the old rpgs like Baldur's gate's Michael Hoenig (Which is a good thing). There is a diverse set of quests for you to take care of, some have pretty emotional stories to tell, and there is always something hidden for you to see. Other good thing is the time manipulation, you can not only make time run faster, but slower, good to micro-manage a fight. SPOILERS, you get a keep, and the ability to manage some sort of building or fortress is always welcome on my book, provided you be able to -really- manage it (I'm looking at you, Baldur's gate 2, the precursor for 'hero gets a keep', but that frustrated me awfully due limiting said keep to just gain gold from time to time.) and in an interesting twist, you have not one, but two kinds of fame, local fame, and personal fame. Some actions can brand you as a specific kind of person, be charitable, and people will find you benevolent, be harsh, and you might get points as a Stoic person. And with bad/good reputation systems per region, like Fallout 2, you can really make yourself a hero of a thousand fames. I can't tell much about the plot, but it has its ups and downs. The game not only acknowledge helpers, but celebrate them, and here and there you will see names of backers in the shape of special npcs with unique stories and messages on cemeteries. Now, for the bad part. Every single trait explained before has huge, huge, huge flaws. Every single point explained can be insanely frustrating, sometimes nearly gamebreaking at times. The backers? You will see thousands of those characters just lying around waiting to be clicked and expecting you to read their stories time after time after time. After the first city, I started to ignore them altogether. They are EVERYWHERE and sometimes they can be downright immersion-shattering. None of them interact with you, in any way, they are just there to be basked upon and so their 'awesome stories' can be read. Combat is a mess. The Allied A.I is so idiotic that it's nearly impossible to have a single fight without micromanagement. If they set on a target, they won't disengage from it without a direct command. Meaning, they can be mowed down by 'opportunity attacks' made by the enemies and worse, step on traps, run inside the area of a fireball (friendly or foe), and much worse. You can't tweak the A.I to me more specific than "kill everything in sight" "Only move if the enemy attacks you", and as another reviewer noted, the enemy AI knows how to work VERY WELL as a team. You can't buff your team before fights, you can't lay more than ONE TRAP and ONE SPELL TRAP, which severely limits strategy. The cleric spells are nearly useless, since many of the status effects that low level enemies can cause on you (Paralysis, Dizzy, Charmed) can be only countered with high-level spells. Which you won't have. Skills are another mess, they are rarely used, useful, and only the main character can use his skills in interactions, meaning, if you are a wizard and spent all your points in lore, no matter if you have two super-warriors with 10 in athletics, you will have to waste a rope or cheat. The devs wanted to avoid minmaxing? Awesome! Then why in the name of Bhaal they chose to put So many interactions with such a high stat requirements? I had to use 18 intelligence to haggle prices with a courtesan, but had to use -Resolve- to talk about an ancient relic with a scholar!? Oh, and you can't stack boosts given by items. Nice, no problem, except that the boosts given are just +1 or +2, items with +3 are awfully rare. Oh and either you get a cape, or a necklace... WHY!? The quests... where to begin? I'm not against straightforward good vs. evil plots. Baldur's Gate 1 main criticisms was that evil characters were screwed because of the dualist nature of the game. I agree with the criticism, but I don't mind that, the game itself was honest in acknowledging it's nature. but many (thankfully not a lot) of quests in Pillars will offer a false sense of morality. A Moral Conundrum is when you can't choose based on the fact that each choice has equally convincing and important arguments. Pillars just pretends to give 'hard' moral choices by offering either something 'good', or something 'evil' that will give you an item, boost, or more money. Again, it would be all fine and dandy... except that Reputation hardly matters except in key points. It doesn't help you buying/selling stuff much, no random groups will try to hunt you down. And the game pretends to always offer you a 'third choice' if you have stats/skills, which it doesn't in points that would really matter. And many, MANY are severely flawed or bugged. There was a quest in which I had to save a group of soldiers from a banshee that enthralled them. I killed the banshee without a single soldier dying, only to discover that the devs never gave you an option of saving said soldiers. You have to kill them. Also, without a warning, you might be suddenly drafted into a faction without the option of getting out, if you merely accept a quest. And many, many personal quests with your companions won't change a SINGLE thing in their story. You could treat certain members awfully, insult them, but... nothing changes, you just gain xp. The game allows you to make items, potions and scrolls, yaaayy! To make something really useful, you will need rare ingredients that rarely appear. The enchantments that you can place on a piece of armor or weapon are severely limited and expensive due said ingredients being rare, so you're better off buying weapons with a shopper, or finding special gear in dungeons. For the last part, the Keep. Having a keep in itself is awesome, a place to call home, a base to build... except that the mechanics are utterly broken. See, to avoid making the players just sit on their asses waiting time to pass to collect money, the devs made time pass in the keep in two senses, turns, and days. Days are used to build stuff like walls and houses, and turns only pass when you finish quests. It has two special stats, security and prestige. They SUPPOSEDLY should bring you more money and guests (prestige), and protect said money and guests (security). I maxed them both, and my money kept getting stolen by bandits. So, it's a good game, but be warned!
