As a fan of Torment for years, I say without hesitation that I have never played a D&D-based game that held me more in thrall than this one. The sheer amount of style, story, and snark set this entry on a golden tier on my personal gaming shelf. Bang around, park your ears, and scan some chant about the Cage, cutters. STORY AND SETTING: By far, the biggest piece of this particular puzzle, the story of Torment is a twisting mystery that drives until the very end. Rather than the humble beginnings in some quaint locale, the usual fare for most RPG's of this sort, the very first scene you're greeted with is seeing your character, a horribly-scarred abomination of a man, waking up on a slab in an interplanar mortuary, with no knowledge of who or what he is. Add to that your first font of knowledge just happens to be a floating skull with an attitude and a tongue sharper than his teeth. And this is only the beginning. Set in what I feel is one of the most interesting D&D settings, the Planescape campaign focuses on the concept of dimensional travel being commonplace. From a central locale, the mysterious city of Sigil that lies at the center of the multiverse, all creatures and beasts from all places and realities can come together to trade, booze it up, get into trouble, and live in an imposed cold civility, regardless of morality or nature. You'll find some of your typical types here, your humans and your elves and what have you. You'll also find angels, demons, devils, zombies, mechanical life-forms, alien entities, grotesque squggly things, and any number of other creatures. The gist of the plot hinges upon the central character, titled the Nameless One, and his quest to figure himself out and just why he happens to be immortal. That's right, freaking immortal. Not only does he regenerate wounds and broken bones, but also lost limbs, and throughout the game you discover that he's "died" so many times he's forgotten himself, and his former lives leave traces everywhere. Along the way, he comes across many people that he's somehow touched, and sees for better or worse how his various incarnations have touched their lives. CHARACTERS: The people of Torment--a term loosely-held in some cases--are some of the most varied and colorful personalities you'll see in a D&D game. The Nameless One, himself, though an amnesiatic, is voiced with gruffness and gravitas by Michael T. Weiss. A refreshing change from the typical voiceless blank, he has quirks and some horribly funny spoken lines, usually something to do with having just died and woken up somewhere later. My personal favorite was always, "I feel like I've been strained through someone's bowels." The rest of the cast is even more interesting, and it's only too bad that you can't take them all with you all the time. Examples include the aforementioned disembodied skull whose major weapon is his mouth (in more ways than one), a trash-talking female street rat with demon in her heritage, a pyrokinetic corpse who still happens to be alive while eternally on fire, a friendly succubus with etiquette and poise, a mechanical robot box with a screw-loose, a Spock-like monk with nearly peerless swordsmanship, and an animated suit of armor that acts like Judge Dredd. All of these characters have voiced lines and deep personalities, with secrets and hidden agendas aplenty. In true form for any Black Isle/Bioware title, it's half the fun of the game trying to figure out the secondary characters, too, and listening to them converse and squabble amongst themselves as you progress through the game. Depending on how you treat them and help them, your actions may even grant them greater understanding of themselves, and thus greater powers. GAMEPLAY: Despite (or some might say because of) the usage of archaic AD&D rules, Torment throws you so many curveballs, unique powers, and strange items, it's far more deep and interesting than the base the AD&D rules provides. Depending on many factors such as the situation, how you proceed through the plot, how much your allies trust you, secrets you've found, or dialogue choices you've made, you can gain many more abilities than the core classes grant. For the Nameless One, you always start the game as a fighter, but you may later change to thief or wizard, and can pretty much freely change back and forth as you feel like, so long as you have those who can train you back to what you want. Your class and the stats you have can alter the game, the paths you take, the rewards you get, and the dialogue options you have available. Each of the other characters tends to play off of the three basic themes of fighter, thief, or magic user, but they all have their own unique twists and abilities to spice things up. Combat, most similar to the Baldur's Gate series, is real-time with pause capabilities, as both Black Isle and Bioware have used to great effect over the years. Vision, positioning, and tactics are all important here. One of the great things about this game, though, is that its reliance on story above all else can mean that you can spend almost the entire game without getting into combat at all. Wits and words can be just as effective throughout, and if you have the mental capabilities for it, you can talk your way through 90% of the challenges you come across. Aside from facing dangers, exploration is paramount. There are oodles of secrets to ferret-out, from items to locations to NPC's to snippets of tales and lore, and many, many tidbits about the Nameless One's history, and numerous incarnations through the years. Encounters and sub-plots are numerous, and the open setting allows for wildly varied creatures and situations to interact with. There are factions to join, other planes to visit, puzzles to solve, items that range from magical tattoos to mechanical weapons to finding your own severed body parts lying around in the trash from who knows how long ago (which grant you bonuses when you "reapply" them, so to speak). SUMMARY: Out of all the D&D games I have played, Torment sticks in my mind the most with its twists and turns, unmatchable characters, varied locations, and just plain weirdness. I would recommend this game to anyone who has enjoyed the Baldur's Gate games, KotOR, or Neverwinter Nights. This is Black Isle at their prime.
I can count the number of base-building games I know about on one hand (not counting sequels), and it's hard to review one without harkening back to the pinnacle of the genre as we've seen it thus far: the venerable Dungeon Keeper series. Evil Genius, when taken in comparison, is enjoyable enough, and has plenty of its own charm, but it really only makes one want to play DK again. To speak to the game's style, it's got oodles of it. It's based quite obviously around James Bond movie-villains, and the elaborate edifices that they build to house their evil, insane, that-can't-possibly-be-efficient bases. Everything from the main menu screens to the music to the style of rooms and traps calls to mind images from those movies. Not to mention the fact that one of your three choices for your Evil Genius is only a white cat away from being Blofeld. This style makes the game amusing for James Bond (or even Austin Powers) fans. There is humor here, though it's not as rife as some would seem to suggest. There are some cute animations and characterizations, and some of the radio broadcasts that result from your devious activities around the world are quite funny, but it's not a laugh-a-minute. You'll go long stretches without even chuckling. In fact, due to some of the frustrations of this game, you might not be in much of a laughing mood at all. In the DK games, part of what made the process so enjoyable was the ability to take it slowly. Sure, things would happen, and you'd be forced to react, or some levels would have a time-pressure, but for the most part, you were able to build at your leisure, and just enjoy the aspect of slowly crafting a small empire. Not so with EG. Unless you have the game set on easy, there are times when you'll be frantically trying to deal with a dozen problems all at once. On easy, you might only be dealing with a half-dozen. The list of frustrations I had were many. Aside from powerful henchmen, you can't move any of your basic minions yourself, instead relying on them to eventually get where they need to go on their own, or using the henches to lead them around by the nose. Gaining more money is an act of micromanagement on the world screen, and you could just as easily lose much of the forces you send out, gain a lot of attention from the forces of justice, and actually lose money as you try to recover your headcount. Sure, you can make your out-world forces hide from the searching law, but that requires that you keep clicking back to the world screen every few minutes to check whether each individual group should be hiding or stealing, not to mention the third option in plotting. Loyalty is a headache-and-a-half, being the one stat your minions can't replenish on their own. You are forced to either have them witness interrogations (remember you can't move them there yourself), or walk around with your Evil Genius, either lurking nearby to low-loyalty minions, or executing one to boost the loyalty of the others who just happen to be around in the one room or corridor you're in. If you're lax in this, you could find yourself with a steady stream of minions--including ones that've invested a serious amount of time in training to upgrade to more powerful minions--running straight out of your base and taking a hike. Imagine this happening every 30 seconds, and it becomes a funding nightmare. Gaining new minions to replace the old ones is either a very slow, free process, or it's a very costly, quick process. Which comes back to money problems. It's been said there are ways to cheat the game, and this is true. You can fool the A.I., or amass quite a bit of money and forces while the game is still in a "training" mode, not sending opposing agents your way. This seems cheap to me, though, having to play this way in order to make any headway or stand against the opposition. The fact that a fair portion of the empire process, the hotel management, can be mostly ignored in favor of just slaughtering tourists makes the whole thing seem slipshod. I could go on, but I think one gets the idea. This game has its share of problems. That being said, it is not without merit. It is charming and amusing, and a definite break from the mostly fantasy-based genre it resides in. Building elaborate traps and testing different base layouts is enjoyable, and there is a bit of fun to be had in collecting the numerous colorful henchmen and the special furniture items to deck-out your inner sanctum. The nefarious deeds you can enact around the world are worth doing if only for some of the funny radio broadcasts. And who doesn't like putting captured enemies into dangerous torture devices just for fun? This game doesn't match the DK games for base-building fun. It doesn't even come close. It is, however, worth a few chuckles, and provides a decent diversion for as long as you care to invest time in it. For the low price it's offered for here, it isn't a waste of money. Just be prepared for some frustrations mixed in with your fun. Personally, I really miss being able to slap minions.
At first glance, the "Neighbours from Hell" compilation may seem silly, simple, and childish. Actually, at second and third glances, too, because that's exactly what this pair of games is, and marvelously so. The premise does a wonderful job of being straightforward and absurd at the same time. Your job is to guide cheeky prankster Woody through various episodes of a TV show based entirely around pranking his grumpy oaf of a neighbor (or neighbour, depending on your textual dialect). Woody is entirely aware that he's on a show, whereas his neighbor--Mr. Rottweiler, according to Wikipedia--is blindly unaware of the 4th wall, which is a comedic situation I always enjoy. You must guide Woody through Mr. Rottweiler's house, constantly avoiding getting caught, setting up traps and tricks to bedevil the old slob. The better you can string pranks together, and thus the angrier you can keep Rottweiler, the better your score for each level. This is an excellent game for kids as well as adults, as the puzzles aren't terribly complicated. You find object A, which can really only be used with household item B. The trick is in creating a line of pranks in the right order to constantly keep Rottweiler steaming, which often involves circling around him as he traverses the house, and hiding in wardrobes or under the bed. Another obstacle that crops up is pets, which Woody must sneak past, which slows him down considerably. The second game of the series adds a variety of vacation scenery for the episodes, instead of just a house, and increased challenges, such as Rottweiler's mother (who seems to be some sort of senior body-builder). While more difficult, it's not unpleasantly so, and the added locations helps keep things fresh. The charm of these games is undeniable. The claymation-esque characters emit a definite "Wallace and Gromit" vibe, and some of the animations are worthy of the chuckles they earn. Mr. Rottweiler cracks his back from shouting so often you'd think he would be wearing a brace by now. This same style carries into the scenery, which is rounded and cartoonish, as well as the soundwork, consisting of peppy "getting into trouble" music and garbled shouting and grumbling from Rottweiler. As a puzzle/casual game, "Neighbours from Hell" wins you over. It's not deep, but it's fun, and its cute brand of mischief is appropriate for anybody who loves a good prank.
Postal 2 is by far one of my favorite games. I liked the original, and though it's a very different animal, you can definitely get a sense of the seeds that were planted there, and how they grew into this. Take Postal 1, ramp up the humor value and the absurdity, add an open city to run around in as you please, and make it a 3D FPS with passable visuals, and you've got Postal 2. It's still chock full of over-the-top violence, and now it has a heaping helping of stereotypes, actually making Postal 2 less politically correct than the first game. For those not easily offended by such things, though, the humor is what makes this game shine. The plot is minimalist (though greatly felt in comparison to the first game), and the gameplay still amounts to killing things, but it's the flavor and the touches of style that make all the difference. Snappy one-liners from the demented Postal Dude, some memorable characters that are hilarious (Krotchy is priceless, and who doesn't enjoy blowing away Gary Coleman?), pop-culture jokes and little jabs at consumerism and real-world items, and a very tongue-in-cheek view of itself. What other game has you swearing at people and threatening them with bodily harm just to get them to sign a petition about violent video-games? Interestingly, the game adapts itself to your level of psychotic abandon. If you're violent, the game quickly becomes just as violent as you are. If you just try to run around and do your errands like a regular guy, the city around you goes insane, and you're forced to react. Ultimately, the end result is the same, but a different feel can be gained from just how demented you choose to be. I've derived a great amount of enjoyment just by people-watching in this game, as you'll often find strange accidents or people blowing each other away, and you can just sit and watch, or you can join in. Gameplay is definitely simple, but it's really as fun as you make it. While it's certainly possible to just beeline to your objectives, this game was tailor-made for exploration. Caches of weapons and items, secret stashes, and even distinct game areas can be found just by poking around. The methods of your madness are also entirely up to you. At average difficulty, your survivability is quite good, so you can worry less about your health, and focus more on having fun blowing away badguys, setting them on fire, hacking off their heads, luring them into traps, or seeing how far you can make them fly with explosives. Apocalypse Weekend adds even more insanity into the mix, quite literally. Demonic Gary Colemans (Colemen?), frenzied cats, a boomerang scythe, Tourette's zombies, and frequent voyages to tripout city, courtesy of a head wound. All-in-all, if you liked the first one, you'll probably like this one. If you like dark humor and a mountain of mindless violence, you'll probably like it, too.
I consider Postal a classic game. It was innovative for its time, not for anything it does, but for its concept. A lot of people don't like it, and that's quite alright. For a lot of people, it's very easy to hate. The trick is knowing what this game is and what it is not, and how that might apply to your tastes. Consider the following: CONTROLS A weak point, here. The controls are pretty bad, but this was before the time of intuitive isometric controls, and was very much not built for dual-analog joysticks. There are buttons for running forward and backward, buttons for turning, and with the press of another button, the turning becomes strafing. Trying to do any of these things together is difficult, and often frustrating. Unless you manage to master the control scheme, be prepared to get shot a lot just moving around a level. It's possible to configure the controls for various schemes, including support for mouse and joystick. I got the most out of joystick control, but it's still a tad irritating. You can try to use the mouse, of course, but it feels awkward, moving the mouse left and right to swivel in place. It's also quite easy to forget that you can duck, which is really only useful in dodging missiles, but it can save your life. There is a crosshair, but it's practically useless. It doesn't show up on screen until you're practically pointed at an enemy, anyway, and exists as a kind of weak auto-aim assist. It doesn't apply to thrown explosives, however, which makes those a pain more often than not. All that said, it is possible to get used to the controls, and to make a decent game out of it. You may just have to crank down the difficulty, some. GAMEPLAY Some would call this a weak point, but I do not. Postal, to me, is actually a casual game, though that might sound odd. It's not built for extended hauls, but it's great for "quickplay". There are no complex goals, no missions, no variety of play styles or alternate solutions to challenges. The gameplay boils down to "kill X badguys, go to next level", and that's it. That's really it. Play for any real length of time, and it becomes very boring very fast. Myself, I play one or two levels at a time, and then stop. I find this works well, as it seems fresh again when I come back, and doesn't wear out its welcome. There is a small variety of means for dispensing pain, but even those can be boiled down to either "shoot" or "explode". You have various ranged guns, various grenades and bombs, and ranged explosives (missiles). You can also use environmental explosives, like barrels. The experience remains largely the same, however. If you're a good shot, explosives can be very effective, but it's hard to aim. You can shoot barrels, but unless you're trying for a group, the amount of shots you expend to blow the barrel could've eliminated a single enemy, anyway. The guns are your primary weapons, some with greater range, some with better damage, but only your weakest has infinite ammo. As for items, there isn't much. Your pickups amount to weapons you can find, ammo for those weapons, body armor, and health. All of these are very precious, so they're not bad, but don't expect anything unique or cool toys to use. It's just tools to keep you alive, and tools to get others not so. Level design is a double-edged sword, I think. The artwork is actually fairly interesting for the time, and I've had a lot of enjoyment just in admiring the look. However, considering the simplicity of the gameplay, there's not much that can be done to make level layouts interesting. A few alternate paths here and there, some bottlenecks (which can hurt you as much as help you), and some "secret" nooks to hide pickups in. As a sidenote, there is a feature to allow you to see yourself behind objects, but it must be noted that this applies only to you, not to your enemies. It's quite easy to run behind something, looking for ammo or health, and blunder right into an enemy who very quickly gets the drop on you. Woe be to you if this enemy has a missile launcher or firebombs. PLOT Okay, this is the one. The sticking point that earns this game the most praise, and the most scorn. The only amount of "plot" this game has comes in the manual. Don't expect to see a hint of it in the game. Personally, I think it feels tacked-on, like someone decided there should be a shred of something to keep the moral wolves at bay. It's a fun little read, but it's largely unnecessary, and won't likely alter the experience for you, though mileage may vary. Stripped aside of plot, this game would appear to be nothing short of a "murder simulator" that puts some people's various undergarments in a twist. The game is about killing. Nothing but killing. No clear judgement, no sense of vengeance, no orders from any authority. You're just some guy shooting a bunch of other people. Is this bad? Well, it depends upon your viewpoint. The game's goals are not "kill everyone". You're tasked with blowing away enemies that are sporting firepower for no good reason other than to shoot you with it, very much before you even give a dirty look in their direction. In fact, unless you're quick on the draw, chances are you won't fire the first shot in the game. Does that make you the psycho, or are you mowing down other psychos, as the manual's plot suggests? You can kill innocent people, but this does nothing for reaching the level goals, and is entirely up to you. As far as being a murder simulator, I think the Hitman series did a better job of that, or maybe Manhunt. There's a wealth of violence and brutality here, but it's tinged--just barely--with dark humor and cynical wit. I enjoy blowing people away in any game, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go out and do it for real, or that I would be any less shocked or disgusted by real-life violence. This is entirely for blowing off steam and releasing aggression on a bunch of pixels and programs. It's fun. CONCLUSION I can certainly see where RWS was going with this, and I applaud this game for spawning Postal 2, which is one of my favorite games of all time. Dark humor, over-the-top violence, and an ascerbic, cynical main character. These things were birthed with this game, and grew up to be so much more in the sequel. If you're looking for something deep, this game is not for you. If you're looking for plot, this game is not for you. If you're looking for rich gameplay, a variety of loot, strategy, or a moral center, this game is not for you. On the other hand, if all you're looking for is mindless, straightforward, distilled, pure action gameplay that is positively excellent in short bursts, this game will give you decent meat to chew on. I, for one, am glad that RWS' works are showing here. They're an underrepresented niche of mature humor, and I salute them. Postal: Classic and Uncut is not a perfect game. It has it's frustrations, and at times it's repetitive and basic, but for what it amounts to, it does its purpose well, and it's certainly worth the small chunk of change that it's being offered for here.
