Read that you have to bring Tristian with you to vordakai´s tomb or smthn such to get briar instead of fake briar from Irovetti later in the game? This seems extremely rigid and would make it so many people never find it(me for the reason I can´t stand Tristian´s incredibly squishy nature and not being able to wear any armor at all while having abysmal DEX).

I got it in the sequence of bringing tristian, then rushing to rescue him before battle. Don't think anything else can affect the sequence. And you need to be nice to him all game too I guess.

Cool thanks, and on another note damn just "wasted" entire playthrough with the intent of fully redeeming and romancing Nyrissa and now I can´t, ow well next playthrough I guess. :P

you have to get Tristian to break the oculus of abbadon, Nyrissa uses it to find the briar and take it. I guess there's a way to find the real briar later in the game though, read the secret ending guide on steam

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Thats why some people say you need to go after Tristian first so she does not get a chance to use the occulus? :)