Know they can take weapon finesse to get DEX to hit, but when leveling a NPC monk from eight eyes I could not get my eyes on the feat that does same but for damage(always forget the name of the feat).

you need amulet of agile fists for that. there are at least several in the game
one of A2 shops should have 1 maybe?

I remember there is one with high bonuses in a main quest tomb late in the game along with LG monk robes.

Hmmm almost better to take 3 levels rogue and choose unarmed strike there then? Start with monk 1 then 3 rogue then 16 monk, that way you can use the Lawful evil monk robe with +5 hit/damage and a +3 hit/damage neck instead + some sneak attack thrown in. :)

depends if you want pure monk or not. those necks are not exactly rare and you can run through the 1st chapter with pretty much anything. if throwing weapons were not so rare it would be even easier. and if you are gonna dip for rogue it's better to start with it so you will have crossbow from lvl1 that will carry you to lvl3 where you'd get finesse training.

Isn't there a ring near Bartholomew's on a body to the south that does that.