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General discussion (archive)I want your opinions on this song I wrote(7 posts)(7 posts)
(7 posts)
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Posted August 25, 2014
So I enjoy writing and recording music. I've been playing Piano for 8 years I think, guitar for 7 and cello for 3. So with great music equipment I enjoy recording songs. So I want y'all's opinion on this song. It's kind of a rocky/funky/ I don't know what kind of song.

I recorded the guitar's piano and organ myself and used a drummer program for the drums. It's supposed to be an instrumental so there's not going to be words... Most of it was done in one take such as the ending solo so I can't really fix that up much without changing.

either way tell me what you think please, I'd love to hear your opinions.

https://soundcloud.com/john-william-hudson-thethird/on-and-on-it-goes
Posted August 25, 2014
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the_atm: So I enjoy writing and recording music. I've been playing Piano for 8 years I think, guitar for 7 and cello for 3. So with great music equipment I enjoy recording songs. So I want y'all's opinion on this song. It's kind of a rocky/funky/ I don't know what kind of song.

I recorded the guitar's piano and organ myself and used a drummer program for the drums. It's supposed to be an instrumental so there's not going to be words... Most of it was done in one take such as the ending solo so I can't really fix that up much without changing.

either way tell me what you think please, I'd love to hear your opinions.

https://soundcloud.com/john-william-hudson-thethird/on-and-on-it-goes
Dynamic changes are nice. It's a good mix of sounds. Nice change-ups between breaks, all-playing and just a couple instruments playing.

It needs a melody, though.

Sounds to me like you need to start collaboating with people!

EDIT: I just listened to several more of your songs, and what I wrote above is true for all of them. In light of that, i have a suggestion for you.

Put a melody and words to your next songs. What you're doing is nice, but it is just the backing to a song that doesn't exist... yet.

Good luck, mate! Songwriting is challenging... and awesome!
Post edited August 25, 2014 by misteryo
Posted August 25, 2014
I'm not quite sure what to say about it. I'll try to explain, since you're insisted. :) I'm a musician myself BTW.

Listing to it a second time right now:

The beginning is good.

@ 0:32 - I think the track takes a turn for the worse here. Is that a guitar that I'm hearing?

@ 1:20 - I don't like this fake-out ending, it just sounds awkward.

@ 1:35 - This reprisal does sound pretty good, it's probably the best part of the track.

To me, something about the overall track sounds out of tune and awkward, not in a good way (no offense). The addition of piano is interesting, but any track that has a silent drop (as your song has) would normally be longer than 2 minutes.

I was sort of expecting some Cello in there as you mentioned it in the OP.
Posted August 25, 2014
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djdarko: I'm not quite sure what to say about it. I'll try to explain, since you're insisted. :) I'm a musician myself BTW.

Listing to it a second time right now:

The beginning is good.

@ 0:32 - I think the track takes a turn for the worse here. Is that a guitar that I'm hearing?

@ 1:20 - I don't like this fake-out ending, it just sounds awkward.

@ 1:35 - This reprisal does sound pretty good, it's probably the best part of the track.

To me, something about the overall track sounds out of tune and awkward, not in a good way (no offense). The addition of piano is interesting, but any track that has a silent drop (as your song has) would normally be longer than 2 minutes.

I was sort of expecting some Cello in there as you mentioned it in the OP.
It sounds out of tune because the second guitar goes switches between G and A when the rythym guitar is playing an A, I did it on purpose to try it out.

The point of the fake out is... well supposed to be awkward. I mostly record stuff as practice for longer songs, so this is still really more of a demo to see how it all sounds together than I ask for opinions as to how to improve.

I don't feel quite ready to add cello yet, I can't find the right song for it...

To Misterio, I suck at writing lyrics, I feel like it's really campy and corny so I just don't... that and I can't sing all that well.
Posted August 25, 2014
The guitar is holding the song back a lot, whomever is playing should work on his skills a little more and then record his part again. Also, not sure if it was intentional or not, but the guitar is off key. Many guitars, especially cheap ones, don't stay tuned for long, so always remember to check it before and during recordings.

I like the song, it reminds me of early 90s grunge and noise rock. But it needs work.
Posted August 25, 2014
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brunosiffredi: The guitar is holding the song back a lot, whomever is playing should work on his skills a little more and then record his part again. Also, not sure if it was intentional or not, but the guitar is off key. Many guitars, especially cheap ones, don't stay tuned for long, so always remember to check it before and during recordings.

I like the song, it reminds me of early 90s grunge and noise rock. But it needs work.
Your ear is off my friend, A: I checked tuning before every take with my Snark and B: My 60's tribute Les Paul wasn't cheap... so not sure what your hearing haha.

And which part in particular are you saying needs to be re-recorded?
Posted August 26, 2014
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brunosiffredi: The guitar is holding the song back a lot, whomever is playing should work on his skills a little more and then record his part again. Also, not sure if it was intentional or not, but the guitar is off key. Many guitars, especially cheap ones, don't stay tuned for long, so always remember to check it before and during recordings.

I like the song, it reminds me of early 90s grunge and noise rock. But it needs work.
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the_atm: Your ear is off my friend, A: I checked tuning before every take with my Snark and B: My 60's tribute Les Paul wasn't cheap... so not sure what your hearing haha.

And which part in particular are you saying needs to be re-recorded?
My suggestions is that the guitar needs to be re-recorded. The price of the instrument doesn't make it stay tuned, it's the bridge and the head stock, etc. Anyway, if the guitar was properly tuned, then you might be slightly bending the strings off key when playing or something. I just heard it again and the guitar clearly goes off key in the last section.
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General discussion (archive)I want your opinions on this song I wrote(7 posts)(7 posts)
(7 posts)