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The Bard's Tale ARPG: Remastered and Resnarkled

in library

3.9/5

( 114 Reviews )

3.9

114 Reviews

English & 6 more
Offer ends on: 10/07/2025 09:59 EEST
Offer ends in: d h m s
19.993.99
Lowest price in the last 30 days before discount: 9.99
Why buy on GOG.COM?
DRM FREE. No activation or online connection required to play.
Safety and satisfaction. Stellar support 24/7 and full refunds up to 30 days.
The Bard's Tale ARPG: Remastered and Resnarkled
Description
“The Bard’s Tale is easily the funniest game I’ve ever played, and I’ve played all the funny games out there.” – IGN “Ready your weapon and bladder as you embark on this ridiculously addicting quest and the funniest adventure of the year, The Bard’s Tale” – Game Chronicles “This game is satire in it...
User reviews

3.9/5

( 114 Reviews )

3.9

114 Reviews

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Product details
2004, inXile Entertainment, ESRB Rating: Teen...
System requirements
Windows 7 / 8 / 10, Pentium 4 2Ghz / AMD AthlonXP 2400, 512 MB RAM, GeForce FX5700 or better / ATI R...
Time to beat
14 hMain
18.5 h Main + Sides
27.5 h Completionist
18.5 h All Styles
Description
“The Bard’s Tale is easily the funniest game I’ve ever played, and I’ve played all the funny games out there.”
IGN

“Ready your weapon and bladder as you embark on this ridiculously addicting quest and the funniest adventure of the year, The Bard’s Tale”
Game Chronicles

“This game is satire in its sharpest form”
Cheat Code Central


You play as the titular Bard, a roguish, manipulative and lewd songster whose priorities in life are the acquisition of material wealth and carnal pleasures. The Bard's pretty sarcastic by nature, but you get to decide just how scathing he is by selecting 'Nice' or 'Sarky' responses. Watch out you don't get too cocky though; folk you've upset may come back to haunt you.

During his raucous adventures, the Bard recruits a motley band of eccentrics and misfits to help in his ignoble cause. Enemies can be defeated using traditional or magical weapons and you can also use the Bard's dulcet tones to summon creatures. If you're tired of saving humankind or bored of games that take themselves a bit too seriously, The Bard's Tale could very well be for you.

FEATURES
  • Includes Original Classic Trilogy! Experience the legendary games that started it all!
  • Full keyboard & mouse controls, as well as controller support.
  • Supports English, French, Italian, German, Spanish, Polish and Russian languages.
  • German voice-over (accessible under Sound Options when game language is set to German)!
  • High-resolution and widescreen support!
  • Performance enhancements.
  • External URLs links on main menu for support pages and related media.
  • Bug fixes to original console release.
  • 50 enemy types (not counting bosses!)
  • A vast world to explore with towns, wild forests, rivers, castles, towers, secret dungeons, snowy mountains, caverns, haunted tombs and more
  • A full cast of bizarre NPC’s
  • Over a dozen special boss enemies to defeat
  • 16 magical characters to discover and then summon at will to aid you
  • Over 150 unique items of weaponry, armor, instruments, tokens, artifacts and loot!
  • More Song & Dance numbers than any other game, including a zombie dance-off!
  • Over 14 hours of outstanding voice-acting from top Hollywood talent, including Cary Elwes (The Princess Bride) as the Bard, and the inimitable Tony Jay as the Narrator
  • Classics Games—includes original classic games The Bard’s Tale 1, 2 & 3.

© 2005 inXile entertainment. All rights reserved. The Bard's Tale is a trademark or registered trademark of inXile entertainment in certain countries; and is a trademark or registered trademark of Electronic Arts Inc. in certain other countries where it is used under license. inXile entertainment and the inXile logo are trademarks of inXile entertainment.

Goodies
artworks avatars cluebooks manuals quick reference cards soundtrack wallpaper
System requirements
Minimum system requirements:
Why buy on GOG.COM?
DRM FREE. No activation or online connection required to play.
Safety and satisfaction. Stellar support 24/7 and full refunds up to 30 days.
Time to beat
14 hMain
18.5 h Main + Sides
27.5 h Completionist
18.5 h All Styles
Game details
Works on:
Windows (7, 8, 10, 11)
Release date:
{{'2004-10-28T00:00:00+03:00' | date: 'longDate' : ' +0300 ' }}
Size:
3.4 GB
Rating:
ESRB Rating: Teen (Violence, Blood, Suggestive Themes, Language, Use of Alcohol)

Game features

Languages
English
audio
text
Deutsch
audio
text
español
audio
text
français
audio
text
italiano
audio
text
polski
audio
text
русский
audio
text
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User reviews

Posted on: November 28, 2017

py.tosha

Verified owner

Games: 17 Reviews: 1

Dead glitches

Game is fine, but on GNU/Linux sometimes arise yellow glitch and game becames slooow... I can not play in it.


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Posted on: February 13, 2023

Megabyte

Verified owner

Games: 549 Reviews: 112

Sometimes the game can not be carried.

To say this game is completely joyless would be a lie. The conversations between the Narrator and the Bard can actually be very funny, but really, that and the songs are about all there is to enjoy in here. I can't be nice about this game. It looks and sounds very good, but the gameplay backing it is terrible. To put it mildly, this is a game that is so bad, I actually found myself actively finding things to do to NOT play this game. I recommend it to absolutely no one, and wish I had not bothered to add it to my collection.


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Posted on: September 19, 2017

Draconifors

Verified owner

Games: Reviews: 8

Simply amazing

This game was recommended to me multiple times, which is the only reason I ever bought it. Haven't regretted that purchase for a single second. Humour is easily the game's strongest suit, and it does it better than any other game I've ever played. The Bard himself is a real jerk, but a super likeable jerk. He's easily my favourite pre-defined player character who does not have pre-game background. The combat can feel somewhat repetitive, but I find that the Bard's battle taunt comments make up for that. Nothing like killing an enemy and hearing "Am I good or what.". I started off with just a sword and shield style, but later on discovered just how awesome archery is in the game. Highly recommend it, especially as it allows you to hit enemies not even visible on the screen. Just aim towards the red dot(s) or sounds and kill them before they can even attack. Music is another big pro; the various songs that the Bard encounters during his travels are great. Lastly, choices that you make. It's not always clear whether it's better to pick the "comedy" (smiling face) or "tragedy (sad face) option, but whichever you choose is -- from what I've seen -- worth trying at least once. So, more than one playthrough recommended. All in all, an excellent game.


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Posted on: March 20, 2025

MrStrats

Verified owner

Games: 57 Reviews: 1

Fun game, worth a playthrough

I remember playing this as a kid but never completing it, nice to go back and replay. The story is funny, made me laugh quite a few times, the fact it takes the mick out of gaming cliche's is great. The gameplay is fun enough, not much replayability and the combat does get samey by the end. Took about 15 hours to do including all side content for me.


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Posted on: April 14, 2025

axltrauts

Verified owner

Games: 392 Reviews: 4

Nice classic

I gotta say I knew this classic has a good sense of humor, and I see the playability is also good enough. I'm sure it will be a fun ride


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