Super 3-D Noah's Ark

Seriously. I need someone to explain this to me. They took DOOM and made a BIBLE game out of it. Repeat that sentence in your head. As for the game itself? I'm not sure what to say really, this is an actual Doom clone and a piece of video game history. It's DOOM but PG and Biblical, which brings me joy. Whenever I want to give a friend a funny or gag gift, I always get them Super 3D Noah's Ark.

Wisdom Tree, first known as Color Dreams was a horribly incompetent, stupid, amoral company that had to illegally sell unlicensed because Nintendo refused to give it permission to sell its shitty games on the NES or SNES. Its games were defined by horrible control, level design, bugs, and balance. Consumers eventually realized that its games were completely unplayable and refused to buy them, so the company claimed to be Christian and changed its name to lure in religious fanatics. This is arguably the worst example, a blatant ripoff of Wolfenstein 3D that removes all that makes it fun, turning it into a joyless slog through a bland, boring environment. This game is slower, harder to control, censored and far more repetitive than the classic it so blatantly plagiarizes. My favorite retro systemwould be the SNES if not for the NES, so I know there are hundreds of far superior games. GOG, you clearly have some agreements with Lucasarts and Capcom so why not port SNES classics like Super Ghouls and Ghosts, Demon's Crest, Knights of the Round, King of Dragons, X-Men Mutant Apocalypse, War of the Gems, Aladdin, Mega Man X 1 and 2-- fuck 3--Street Fighter 2, U.N. Squadron, Zombies Ate My Neighbors, Super Star Wars or Indiana Jones Trilogy? Why are you taking a treasure trove and fishing a piece of shit out of it?