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^ is jealous of my fabled second screen (heheh)
^ upon watching Faces of Death he decided to try monkey brain straight from the skull. After seeing the poor creature locked up like that in-person, however, he proceeded to use his latent ninja powers to knockout the entire monkey brain restaurant staff and freed all the monkeys.

However he discovered the monkey he was about to eat was Mother Sha-Boo-Boo herself who was captured while on shore leave.

Mother Sha-Boo-Boo and Sachys battled onward, through the civil war, through both world wars, they took a break during Vietnam; but that would prove to be Mother Sha-Boo-Boo's mistake as Sachys plunged the sacred dagger of Khaza-dum into her heart thus ending her monkey tyranny once and for all.

Bruised and battered Sachys decided to work as an insurance salesman while waiting for the internet to be invented so he could download and play classic PC games.

Also he's a time traveler.
Post edited January 18, 2013 by ShaolinsKunk
^ doesn't explain why a time traveler has to "wait" for internet to be invented.

uh, or... why does one wait for the internet in order to play old classic while they were ready and available when he started waiting and they weren't old and classic yet and....
^ gets confused by a minor paradox related plot loophole
^ doesn't realize that the plot holes aren't really plot holes, they're features!
^ has cheese from switzerland with more features than dairy content
^ Believes everything on the internet.
^and anyone that doesn't believe, he sends them down the Hudson river with some cement shoes
^ Is very correct and is also on my good side.
Post edited January 18, 2013 by Dademolee
^ Is a ghost
^ first will run away of ghost, then turn on them and eat them
^used to sell ectoplasm pudding until a customer got possessed and tried to bring back the 80's
^Can never start anything .......but definitely Finnish
^ suffers delusions of grandeur, believe to be the legitimate heir of the ancient Caesars and to be destined to rule the world from the seven hills of Rome, while wearing only a bed sheet as clothing
^ Suffers the same delusions but without the bed sheet