THE TRUTH HAS BEEN REVEALED!
When all suspects were thrown into a pool, only three names resurfaced. These three sinners will be dealt with. All others can now rejoice in the knowledge that they were found to be pure of heart.
The most convincing lie is the one that the liar believes in himself. And you,
Klumpen0815, have been found guilty of truly believing that you're innocent. But the Beast still managed to corrupt your principles just by offering one regionally priced game. You shall be consumed by
Shadows.
Blue Mooner, you appear to be both silver-tongued and a philosopher, both of which spells doom for you, as we can't have Satan confusing our flock of pious sheep with the demonic ideas of independent thought and logic. Your fate is sealed by
The Inquisition.
Hijack, your crime is not to be disclosed, but we know you did it, because the Pentagon told us so, and the Pentagon is infallible. You won't escape
The Inquisition either.
There is but one chance for you heretics to
redeem yourself; a code of indulgence will be sent to you, and in turn you will acknowledge your savior who will be revealed in the process of redemption. All praise is due to this benefactor, the Inquisition has been merely a tool to serve justice in the savior's name. But don't make a public show of it, like you're used to - direct your thanks to noone but your savior. (In other words, check your PM and thank the gifters in private!)
/all heresy