Under The Moon

- Game's ulgy on an artistical and technical level, like your characters have no facial features and looks like playdo. - Made me play with a gamepad and the keyboard at the same time, couldn't find the key for "use" on the controller. - Game makes you run around on a straight up linear level at the pace of a geriatric turtle. - I'm pretty sure the grandpa at the intro talks with an AI voice. - The ridles are pretty weak.

To those who cannot read the riddles: use the default controls during the tutorial messages. After that, you can rebind them as you see fit (well almost, considering up and down are inverted, same with left and right), then take a deep breath and submit yourself to this sorry excuse for a game. The story? Meet Ali, village idiot extraordinaire who one day gets bored and become a psychotic stalker. By this, understand that he professes his love for Leila and proceeds to chase her over six levels set in as many countries, while stealing random stuff around, because "riddles", see? "Clues" that Leila left behind for him, see? Aforesaid stolen items include such things as a wheel of cheese, a broom, a beehive, a street lamp, a coffin and, err... "the blood of the salad anatomy". I'm not making it up. Typos and dubious grammar, bugs, static clouds and flying bushes, questionable design (careful: clicking on "new game" will not bring up a confirmation prompt and your current save will be erased; I'd almost finished the game when I discovered that), minimalist plot, crappy synthetic text-to-speech voice-over, short length (even with a protagonist that moves excruciatingly slowly): Under The Moon has it all, and then some! "Heck", I hear you saying "they sent me to the loony bin for using a cheese grater on my elbow and trying to fit my head inside a trombone, but playing this is actually legal? Far out, dude!" More seriously, shame on Gog for selling this while boasting about their "curated" approach and inventing messages from "many gamers" to justify their cowardness.

If you just happen to notice that it's gone on giveaway, for free... ...then it still costing you more than it's worth, just in terms of the time it would take you to click the giveaway button. Never even mind the extra time it would take you to download, install, launch, and play for long enough to realise how terrible it is. In fact, by the time you've even noticed it being here, you've already spent too much. My advice would be to just move on as if you hadn't noticed it. I sort of feel like the developers owe me some recompense for the time I wasted only to be subjected to such a rubbish game. That's where the mixed feelings come in. I was a bit torn about whether I should write this review at all, since it may cause people to waste even further time/thought on this game... ...as much as I loathe the idea of wasting my own time writing this, or potentially someone else's time reading it, I also consider it a sort of public service to warn others about how bad this one is. If I can spare just one person the wasted time and disappointment, then I feel like perhaps I've contributed something positive to the world, which is a tiny step toward helping to help counter-balance the sheer awfulness of this game being wantonly set loose upon an unfortunate public. Just. Don't. Friends don't let friends, and all that.

just stick to text. Every voice in this game sounds AI generated so the entire thing comes across as a shitpost.

This isn't a good ol' game. This is a POS. It reminds me of student demos from the 90's. I am so angry it took me 10 minutes to see that. It looks like a child made it. Unreal 5 engine? This is like opening a bottle of beer with a TOW missle. Pro tip: if you hide teapots, kitties and things in the picture that are clickable, you can have a hidden object game. Cudos to the giant scary human NPCs