Posted on: January 23, 2025

pzogel
Verified ownerGames: 417 Reviews: 63
Nosferatu: The Wrath of Jank
How much you'll enjoy this one will largely depend on your tolerance for jank. If you love jank, then this is an easy 5 out of 5, and you're in for a real treat. If you don't, then you'll likely find that whatever atmosphere the game is trying to create goes right out of the window when you see enemies clipping through furniture, your own character clipping through enemies or solid matter, and similar goofs. The premise isn't half bad actually. Set in a castle that may well be lifted straight out of Murnau's Nosferatu, you arrive at what was supposed to be a wedding, and need to traverse randomly generated rooms to find and rescue your stranded relatives, lest they get killed by all the monsters roaming around. The issue with the procedural generation is the fact that the layouts don't make a whole lot of sense. Often, there is nothing but enemies in a room, so you might as well quickload when that is the case. However, when doing so, enemies often get randomly generated right next to you, adding another layer of jank. Once you've found a relative, you get to escort them back to safety, all the way at the start of the game, in typical 2000s FPS escort mission jank fashion, and you'll be doing that up to 15 times. Obviously, everything looks exactly the same, so have fun getting disoriented. My favorite part was when I was on a roof, and the rescued relative clipped down the roof to his death, in proper jank fashion. The game is neither scary nor challenging at any point, and despite all the padding with dozens of enemies around every corner, you'll find yourself facing the Count in yet another jank encounter in less than four hours. Overall, I can concede that Nosferatu has a certain jank charm to it (grandfather carrying a machine gun in his trunk gave me a chuckle), but if you're asking me if you miss anything if you don't play it, then my answer is no.
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