Posted on: April 13, 2017

Killedbyhetfield
Games: 243 Reviews: 9
Every Adventure Game Sin Rolled Into One
Most of us know that those old-school Sierra games have a reputation for being sadistic and unforgiving - So you know what you're signing up for when you play them; however, most of them at-least have charming graphics, music and writing, interesting puzzles, memorable characters, a dash of humour, and are short enough that you can kind-of forgive the game for making you start all over again because you forgot something in the first screen. This game has **none of that**, save for maybe the graphics/music being charming enough. Instead, the first half of the game is dominated by you having generic military conversations with highly-forgettable cardboard cutouts padded by puzzles that amount to nothing more than "read the manual and type what it tells you to". It reminds me of that quote: "Oh cool - A puzzle where you have to type out the instructions for CPR from the manual. How fun!" -- Nobody ever on the face of the planet There are also several places where this game will force you into no-win situations for the most frustrating of reasons. Spoiler alert - When you give the security guard your ID don't forget to check it when he gives it back - He gives you back the wrong one. (I guess they hire awesome guards at the Pentagon). Of course, you won't find that out until you've wasted hours of your time and are forced to replay hours of this so-called "game". I know - what a great puzzle! Sorry I ruined it for you! /s Oh, and if you lose at the dice game or decide not to waste your time playing it, you'd better reload - There's no skill involved (it's completely chance-based), but if you don't beat the world's worst employee at gambling on-duty on the way to a life-or-death mission you've already lost the game - But you won't find that out for hours. To add to other reviews, the "submarine simulator" is like... 75% of the game's length, tedious, unskippable, and you will likely have to play through it every time you restart the game - which will be often.
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