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General discussionPolish jokes(87 posts)(87 posts)
(87 posts)
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This is my favourite topic
Posted February 17, 2015
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Soccorro: Here's a joke about turks as compensation:
I wonder how many users are aware of your Turkish ancestry. Otherwise it just appears like extra racism. :D
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tinyE: -I don't know?
-Because they're so darn stupid! XD
Lol. I actually laughed.
Post edited February 17, 2015 by F4LL0UT
Posted February 17, 2015
What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?

--> Every morning you'll rise and shine!
Posted February 17, 2015
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Soccorro: Here's a joke about turks as compensation:
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F4LL0UT: I wonder how many users are aware of your Turkish ancestry. Otherwise it just appears like extra racism. :D
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tinyE: -I don't know?
-Because they're so darn stupid! XD
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F4LL0UT: Lol. I actually laughed.
That was actually from a movie. Kind of, I edited for content. :P
Posted February 17, 2015
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tinyE: That was actually from a movie. Kind of, I edited for content. :P
To quote my old history professor:
"You never cease to disappoint me."
(actually he said "you didn't disappoint, as always" but he meant the former)
Posted February 17, 2015
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Cyraxpt: People from Poland are called pole? I thought it was pollack.
They are in Swedish (almost). 1 polack, 2 polacker.
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tinyE: Okay here we go:

- How many Polocks does it take to screw in a light bulb?

- I don't know? One?

-No it takes three! XD
No wait I told it wrong. Okay let me start over.
Okay, why does it take three Polocks to screw in a light bulb?

-I don't know?

-Because they're so darn stupid! XD
That's just bollocks.
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tinyE: And Ahhh yes, what are we arguing over punchlines now? :P It's a retelling of the blond joke, "Blond going to Disneyland; sees the sign that says 'Disneyland Left' so she turned around and went home."
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ZFR: Ah, but it's funnier with "bear left" because both words "bear" and "left" have a double meaning, while Disneyland is just Disneyland.
Disneyland could have left, couldn't it? (imagine that...)
Post edited February 17, 2015 by Maighstir
Posted February 17, 2015
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Cyraxpt: People from Poland are called pole? I thought it was pollack.
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Maighstir: They are in Swedish (almost). 1 polack, 2 polacker.
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tinyE: Okay here we go:

- How many Polocks does it take to screw in a light bulb?

- I don't know? One?

-No it takes three! XD
No wait I told it wrong. Okay let me start over.
Okay, why does it take three Polocks to screw in a light bulb?

-I don't know?

-Because they're so darn stupid! XD
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Maighstir: That's just bollocks.
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ZFR: Ah, but it's funnier with "bear left" because both words "bear" and "left" have a double meaning, while Disneyland is just Disneyland.
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Maighstir: Disneyland could have left, couldn't it? (imagine that...)
Don't tell me, tell Glen.
Posted February 17, 2015
A 747 recently crashed in a cemetery in Poland.
Polish officials have so far retrieved 4000 bodies.
Posted February 17, 2015
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F1ach: The only Polish jokes I know are VERY rude, so rather than be insulting, here is my contribution to international peace :)
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Novotnus: Not nice to tease and then refuse to deliver :)
Agreed with this gentleman.

It's like saying " Hey, I got this super duper thing... But I won't show it to you, 'cause you know... "
*wink wink*

That's cruel, man. Cruel. ;)
Posted February 17, 2015
How do you get a one-armed Polish guy out of a tree?


You wave to him.
Posted February 17, 2015
Just a slight off-topic notice.

As far as I know, so called "Polish jokes" are result of highly anti-polish propaganda spread in the US by Germans who were able to get here after the World War II.
Post edited February 17, 2015 by DrakoPensulo
Posted February 17, 2015
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DrakoPensulo: Just a slight off-topic notice.

As far as I know, so called "Polish jokes" are result of highly anti-polish propaganda spread in the US by Germans who were able to get here after the World War II.
Funny thing is they don't tell Polish jokes where I live, just Finish jokes.
Posted February 17, 2015
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gunsynd: Next please....
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Crewdroog: ? you no like?
That was the best joke I heard all day after Licurg's.


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F1ach: The only Polish jokes I know are VERY rude, so rather than be insulting, here is my contribution to international peace :)

A Britsh guy, a French dude, a Mexican,and a Texan are on a plane.

The captain comes on the radio and says, " We have lost Engine 1, please throw all the luggage and any unused seats out of the airplane to lighten the load." So they do.

Then he comes back on the radio and says,"We have lost Engine 2,would anyone please jump out of the plane to lighten the load."

The british guy volunteers and as he jumps out he screams"God save the Queen!"
Then the piliot comes back on the radio and says,"We have lost Engine 3,would someone else volunteer to jump out of plane to lighten the load."
So the french guy jumps out of the plane and screams,"Viva La France!"
Then before the pilot can say anything else the Texan grabs the Mexican and throws him out and shouts REMEMBER THE ALAMO!
Looks like we have a tie.
Post edited February 17, 2015 by AnimalMother117
Posted February 17, 2015
They invented a special robot in Japan. The robot was designed to catch thieves. They left it on a street and within one hour the robot caught 100 thieves. They were so happy with this result so they sent it to US and within five minutes the robot caught 100 thieves. So they sent it to Poland and within five seconds... the robot was stolen.
Posted February 17, 2015
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F1ach: The only Polish jokes I know are VERY rude, so rather than be insulting, here is my contribution to international peace :)
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Novotnus: Not nice to tease and then refuse to deliver :)
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Novotnus: Not nice to tease and then refuse to deliver :)
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Tza: Agreed with this gentleman.

It's like saying " Hey, I got this super duper thing... But I won't show it to you, 'cause you know... "
*wink wink*

That's cruel, man. Cruel. ;)
Well :

This polish guy walks into a bar with a lump of dogshit in his hand and says to the bartender..."Look what I nearly stepped in".

:)

Here we tell jokes based on counties, there are two particular counties that are the butt of those jokes, Cork and Kerry.

Did you hear about the man from Cork that emigrated to Kerry and raised the IQ in both counties. :)
Post edited February 17, 2015 by F1ach
Posted February 17, 2015
Why does the new Polish Navy has glass bottom boats?
So the crew can see the old Polish Navy.
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This is my favourite topic
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General discussionPolish jokes(87 posts)(87 posts)
(87 posts)