I have the steam client installed as well only reason is i have been playing scratches the directors cut it seems to me steam takes over everything so as soon as iam done scratches here no more steam. its so annoying

Saying that an unexpected and unwanted interaction between two different applications on one's computer is annoying isn't being a "drama queen" by even the loosest definition of that term.
Insulting someone who's said nothing bad (in the same sentence one asks for more information to ostensibly try to help the insultee, no less) might be the act of a drama queen, however.

I've had something similar to this happen, but it's not consistent. Suffice to say, if Steam is doing any downloading, even if it's nowhere near my cap, Galaxy is less likely to succeed in its update checks. Naturally, this is more likely to happen if GOG actually has an update to download than if it's just checking to see if there's an update, but I've seen Steam screw up both.

But like I said, it's not consistent. Granted, it's taught me not to run Galaxy when Steam is downloading and that's probably avoided a lot of problems, but it's not a guarantee either way.

Yeah, I haven't seen anything close to this personally because out of necessity I don't keep both clients running at the same time.

I must admit though I'm having difficulty fully understanding the problem you are describing. Can you try again, maybe with a few more details? Take it slow, step by step: what are you doing, and what is happening exactly.

I don't have a solution for your problem, but did you already contact Steam (and possibly also GOG) support and what was the outcome?

Companies will probably require that you contact their support before anything else. It could also be that they can help.

That's quite interesting. If this is the GOG installed version I guess they left some Steam DLL's or something active?

I would hope, 'cause otherwise we're talking about subversion and malice on either company's side. I'd rather not think the companies are going as far as to rage cyber warfare on our computers.

when i go to click on GOG icon on my desk top steam comes up and starts updating so i cant connect to GOG then on the odd time gog will come up and try to up date and of course stram will come up and start updating then when that is done GOG will say there was a problem updating and it says something about i can always download the laste version think i already have it . basicaly that is what is happening ok maybe i shouldnt be such a drama queen thats funny,

I don't use these applications, so I can't say what really helps.
But if I understood the problem correctly, Steam client is taking over while GOG client (Galaxy?) is trying to do something.

I would personally try the following:
- reboot the computer
- start Steam client and let it update whatever it wants to update
- go to task manager and kill all Steam client processes
- launch GOG client and let it update whatever it is trying to update.

Again, I'm not sure if that helps, but at least that way you don't have any pending Steam updates, so if the problem occurs again, it's not based on any updating, it just appears to be that way.

Two installers cannot run at the same time, by design in Windows.

It's a simple fact of life.

That's not even remotely true. It's supposed to work that way, but only if the installers are compliant with the standard meant for that. I know GOG's inno based installers don't work that way, as i regularly run 3 or more at a time when i'm mass installing things.