Darkforce24: Have you tried resting and coming back later, or leaving the cemetery entirely and returning after some time has passed?
Another less favorable option might be to restart the game and try it again with plenty of different save files just in case.
Arggghhh. I've just been hit by this bug too. Waited until the last minute to speak to the jewellery but I enter grimy's tomb and no ghoul lord ... anyone know a way of hacking the game here?
UPDATE:
I have an easy fix, without spending hours debugging the quest flags etc. in the saved game:
Important: This has only been proven to work if the party is in grimy's tomb. If the spirit is angry and the possessed character is disabled they will end up permanently disabled. Make sure the jeweller is content first!
A) Download UGE10 (Universal Game Editor) - see a topic in this section of the forum regarding editing saved games.
B) Download the Ravenloft profile - also listed in the same topic.
C) Run UGE10 and set up the Ravenloft profile.
D) Point UGE10 to your SAVE.DAT file
E) Change the DEAD STATUS on your possessed character from 1 to 0.
F) Put item 112 (The Jeweler's Key) into an empty (-1) hand slot of any character.
G) Go back to the Jewler's pad and get the Gem.
All done and sorted, no waiting for Grimmy to turn up (tried a lot of tricks, couldn't get him to show).
My ideal solution would have been to summon Grimmy and kill him to trigger the quest flag, or at least hack the quest flag. If anyone knows how to do these things please shout...