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^ banned, because time wounds all heels
Banned because food is the new time.
Banned because poison is the new food.

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ST0N3L3SS: Shiver me timbers! I ban ye to beyond the seven seas you scurvy licking rapscallion!
Shiver your own timbers! I ban ye to beyond the seventh gate of Hell, you rabid smelling wrapped scallion!
Banned because your avatar doesn't even look human.
Banned for hypocrisy.
Banned because I'm shocked and outraged with your direct insult. I'm absolutely bewildered.
Banned for admitting :)
^ banned for being admitted (to the insane asylum)
Banned because I escaped through the sewers.
Banned for playing The Elder Scrolls games too much.
^ banned, because too much is never enough
Banned because too little is even more lacking.
Banned for trying to count how much of something is. That something is uncountable.
Banned for... I give up, I can't state a reason.
Banned for giving up. Surrender denied. We take no prisoners here.