It seems that you're using an outdated browser. Some things may not work as they should (or don't work at all).
We suggest you upgrade newer and better browser like: Chrome, Firefox, Internet Explorer or Opera

×
Using the technology of tomorrow to bring you the excitement of the yesteryear!

GOG.com proudly presents the next step in DRM-free retro-gaming: [url=http://www.gog.com/retromator4000]Retromator 4000, a universal nostalgifier for PC & Mac. Our software engineers are very close to producing a stable version, and we're very excited to finally be able to tell you about this revolutionary piece of software. Even more so, because very soon we'll be able to invite you to take part in public alpha testing of the app! (That is as soon as we get the 0.97a version up and running.*) We're glad that GOG.com users will be the first to take part in our next revolution. Or rather: re-evolution ;-)

Ok, but what's Retromator 4000, you might ask, and what does it do exactly? Without going into technical specifics of quantum-level digital retro engineering, let's just put it as simply as possible: it takes your modern current-gen games and turns them into retrotastic, beautifully pixelated classics or even text-based adventures from back in the time when graphics were an option, not a must. All because we know what GOG.com customers are all about--nostalgic gaming!

We've prepared a little [url=http://www.gog.com/retromator4000]preview[/url] of our fantastic app working its magic on three modern age classics: The Witcher, Alan Wake, and Dreamfall: The Longest Journey, so you can easily see the effect Retromator 4000 has on current-gen adventures, RPGs, and action games.

As we said, there's a public alpha version of the software coming towards you as soon as it's done, but there's still plenty of room for your suggestions and input. We would love to know how would you retromate your favorite game, so please--feel free to leave a mock-up screenshot or a piece of text-adventure in the comments below. There are 5 free games waiting for the authors of the best entries! One thing though, the Retromator 4000 will only be usable with DRM-free GOG.com games, so please limit your efforts to retromating only those.

Again, we're extremely happy to be able to introduce this new and exciting GOG.com feature. Please take a moment to see the preview, and maybe stay for the contest mentioned above!

*The estimated time of completion of the public alpha version is based heavily on fuzzy logic and quantum mechanics. In other words--we think that it might be done soon, but it just as well might take much, much longer. Also, in n-1 parallel universes, the Retromator 4000 is already available. The contest deadline is much more specific: Thursday, April 4, at 12:00 GMT.
Dammit, that means all my hard work on my C64-version of The Witcher 2 was in vain. Oh well, the framerate sucked anyway.
Attachments:
witcher2.png (23 Kb)
Such a shame this isn't for real...
You Serious???? April Fool's Right? HaHaHaHa!
My desire for this to be real completely overrided my good sense and it took a while for me to realize it was just an April Fools joke.

Still, today's April Fools joke could be tomorrows reality.
Do want!
Yeah, that kinda software would be utterly intriguing. The shareware creation feature (deduct ~3 hours of game time) made me laugh out loud. Very accurate for past games!
"Add an EMS & XMS memory management minigame. Also has optional IRQ conflicts module and autoexec.bat options." ...This is brilliant.
avatar
hucklebarry: I think my app is broken... can we count on a hotfix soon? Thief does NOT look right....
How is this broken? You're clearly running the game in vector mode.
avatar
Khalaq: The scary thing about it is that it brings back memories of the earliest computer games we used to play. Yes, the text-based games were really like that.
Text-based games have really come far in the last 10 years, but they don't look much different now.
I wish this game was real :P
avatar
angeli: The idea is so incredibly brilliant that I would love to see at least 10 of "demo screens" :) :) :)
Not only 3...

And also: there should be a "tape emulator" option. Anybody remembers?
6 kids waiting for a game to load and after 20 minutes of deadly silence,
just few seconds before the end, there goes a cat that happens to touch the table
and - voila - transmission error :)

These were true emotions!
I prefer the "Tandy / TRS 80" cassettes that would crash if the volume wasn't set correctly.

Also there should be DLC to see the games in green / black, amber / black, white black, and also the 'wonderful' Apple 2e sound 'er beep system.

BTW, why no 4 color CGA version?

Also no mouse support either on the really old DLC versions.

Maybe include a 'codewheel' that emulates DRM back in the 'good ole days' with colored text and colored plastic that made you decode text or symbols, and manuals where you had to type the x word in paragraph y on page z. I'm sure people would prefer doing that than play the game!

Although I still have my Rocket Ranger code wheel!
Hmm... anyone else feel like they ripped off Gruntmaster 6000?
Ha ha, so awesome. Good luck to all contestants. I love April Fools.
OK, I was being nice before, but since no one else has said it, I guess I'm going to have to be the bad guy. It's obvious to everyone that your new technology doesn't work efficiently (putting it mildly) with Witcher 2. I can only imagine how awful it will look with the original Witcher. Which is disappointing, considering we're talking about your flagship titles.
Thankfully, I have been working on something for the past year that could solve your problem. I call it Retroficator 5000! In order to prove the superiority of my program, here is a sample picture from the Witcher running on Retroficator 5000. I've also enabled my groundbreaking hand-drawn filter.
If you're interested in buying me out, send me a PM, I'm sure we'll work out a deal.

#programmingskillz
Attachments:
Post edited April 01, 2013 by DarkoD13
For my entries, I'm trying a retro-mix with images from games, with (at least) the main one being GOG. I'll put links to the originals, then my retro-mix.

Tales of Monkey Island

Chains of Satinav
Attachments:
tales.jpg (270 Kb)
satinav.jpg (267 Kb)