One of the most heartbreaking things I ever saw was when I made new friends when I went to university. An old school friend of mine and myself stayed in a dorm for part of our first year, a shitty dorm mind you but that's besides the point. We met two other guys and the four of us just naturally started to hang out together, forming a new group. One guy in the group, say his name was Peter, like me had a really good old school friend, say his name was Jim, that also came with him to the same dorm. After a while I noticed that Peter preferred hanging out with us to hanging out with Jim. Jim was a nice guy and he repeatedly tried to get Peter to do hang out with him, only for Peter to always make an excuse, and I could see that Jim was gradually getting more and more upset as the months went by. Eventually the four of us left the shitty dorm together and moved into a commune. Never heard of Jim after that. It's sad, because both were great dudes, it's just that one started to prefer the company of his new friends. I'm not sure how to feel about the whole story.
Regarding your situation, I think I could also identify with it, regarding the school of friend of mine I mentioned above. We were best friends for 7 school years and used to do a lot of stuff together. The difference now is that I'm lucky if I see him once per month. Come to think of it, for the last couple of years, we only hang out 5 or so times per year if that. I don't feel too bad about it anymore and have come to accept it because he, unlike me, is an extremely social person with an enormous circle of friends which, importantly, he started to acquire as we got older and started to come into contact with more and more people. And he likes to hang out with a lot of them which, from this point of view, eats up his social time. I know however that he now prefers hanging out with them, just like what happened with Peter and Jim. But that's ok, even if I don't like it. I don't feel it's fair to be emotionally blackmailed into staying good/best friends if you don't want to. It's harsh, but that's the way it is.
To be honest, my biggest concern is that he 1. shaved his long long hair 2. sold all his music 3. sold all his games 4. stopped gigging, which gives me the impression he is so busy trying to fit in with the cool kids at work.
It might just be me but it's quite depressing being 29 with no friends, social life or anyone to talk to in general. (probably why I spend more time on these forums). I mean, what would the point of going out to meet new people if it just starts that same cycle all over again.
It reminds me of a situation where I lost about 20 contacts and drinking buddies because I stopped binge drinking.
Well i was in the same situation. The fact however is that they were not the buddies if they lost a contact to you just when you changed your habbits. In Russia we call them bottle mates. The fact however is that there are two types of people mostly 1) They will be with you till they can get some profits from it 2) Or those friends on interests which describes those who stick to you cos you got same interests habbits taste hobbys etc.
Ofc there are some exceptions but i described my point of view on the most common cases.
Indeed, I don't miss those two faced gits at all lol. But it was a bit of pain getting use to be around 30 odd people to about 3 haha.