Granted but they now taste like grass too and you also have to eat large quantities for low nutritional value.

I wish i could get without paying, a bottle of 30 years old rum, the extra aged, spiced yellow. Yes, the one that costs 600 euros to order...

Granted. You follow Jack Sparrow into a dark alleyway and grab his bottle of aged rum before it would have hit the ground anyway as he conveniently passes out. Unfortunately, the cork just will...not...come..out...of..that..bottleneck. *huff huff*

I wish there were a lot more honeybees back in the world

Wish granted. You certainly don't mind a sting now and then, it can be beneficial to health!

I wish to open the hives of said beez and eat fresh and raw, right from inside its storage cells (using a very small and very thin branch's edge with the size of a toothpick), pollen, honey and royal jelly, plus get one or two stings during the process. There is nothing better than this.

Granted. You are now Winnie the Pooh for all eternity. Oh, bother.

I wish honey weren't so sticky.

Granted! It is now the greasiest substance known to man and it is used to lube industrial machinery.

I wish doing crunches worked out all of your abdominal muscles and not just the little top part.

Granted. But they're still a pain in the buttocks to do.

I wish Jeff Vogel, head honcho of Spiderweb Software success in all his software.

Granted, but in whatever hardware his software is inserted, just goes *boom*.

I wish for gay marriages to be instigated worldwide, soon. This will create endless more opportunities for straight old me.

Granted, but you're forced into a gay marriage, too.

I wish for our current Prime Minister to suddenly vanish.

Granted. But along with him, all of the nation's gold stock vanishes, too.

I wish for a serious, committed relationship instead of numerous flings and endless softcore games.

Done! You're now a conjoined twin. Can't get much more committed than that.

I wish I had my own zoo.

granted, but unfortunately you forgot to get a staff to take good care of all the animals; soon your zoo descends into animalistic anarchy.

I really wish Belgium would simply stick to buying Grippens instead of those american junk JSF's

granted. but the belgian government is taken over by anti-american north-african migrants who spend all their time posting edgy ISIS videos on youtube unironically.

sample text
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFc7SCurpiU


oh, and i wish for world peace.

Granted, by way of you being the only human left on earth.

I wish for a sequal to Dishonored!

Granted. Unfortunately, it's still Bethesda, so Dishonored 2: Dishonorable Discharge is so loaded up with DRM that you have to provide a fresh blood sample every time you want to play.

I wish I didn't have to shave anymore.

Granted. You start growing permanent whiskers that cannot be cut or shaved by ANYTHING. Not even with careful skill via a small Ginsu knife. Eventually you will be mistaken for a Duck Dynasty fan, and in time you will grow a beard that's so long it will get caught in your feet when you walk, but hey at least you don't have to shave anymore.

I wish I had a real life lightsaber.